|
SubscriptionsSites I Read
|
|
|
|
| oh how I have missed this time zone. Strangers are great and their mystery never ends but there is nothing like looking at your own history in the faces of your friends. | | |
| Roll on top of me baby just ROLL ROLL ROLL!!
....I can die now. I am a happy person. | | |
| Let me start off by saying that I need to sober up my life. Just not right now. Sorry Mom. Sorry God.
Ok kids this is what we call post "show" wrap up. Savvy? Right. Since it would take way too long to give a play by play recap of the nights events, so I have decided to just list the choice moments and comments (tidbits if you will) of this weeks episode of 'The Real World: San Francisco 04'. In this week's episode we find ourselves at a "Fashion Don't Party" that goes terribly wrong. Or should I say terribly right, because lets face it...I brought my 'A' game. :
P.S. Just picture yours truly wearing a nice denim skort (yes i said SKORT),a verry large "Seacreast Out" shirt and a oversized denim jacket which had a wonderful scene of a woman sitting in a lovely french cafe painted on with puffy paint.
P.P.S. These are in noo particular order. For that would be way too complex for the half of a brain that I have left.
1) Lets just say the Challis got me into this mess but I was the one who had the last laugh. Didn't I Challis?! May the Challis, although the instigator of the nights events, rest in peace(s).
2)One word: Saundiepants..Two more words: Saundie Pondie.
3) Famous last words... " Andrew, lets race!!!"
4) Heres how it went down. 1) "Seacreast Out" gets old. 2) I find a pair of sicssors. 3) Seacreast got a whole new look and everyone GETs a good look at "them" when they actually did come out.
5)Trail mix in Cat's "crotch", courtesy of yours truely.
6) Stashing a browine in the couch "for later".
7) Never going back for that poor brownie.
8) Andrew, who is butt naked at this point (or is it buck naked? You can help me out on this one Leslie.), and I prancing and dancing in the sprinklers of the Panhandle Park. He is nude, nude, nude except for a well placed mitten and then there is me who is having way to much fun in the sprinklers until I get bitch slapped by one, and start thinkin sprinklers are evil and no fun anymore.
9) among the many items I happened to "borrow" off the streets of Frisco for the evening included:
* a piece of construction pipe that became my "bracelet"
* numerous leaves
* a very large purple and green terradactyl kite, that until this morning I thought was a boquet of flowers.
* two skinned knees
10) I think glorious number ten will be the time to mention the "trip" heard 'round the world (or at least 'round Grove street). There I was, Challis in hand, lookin for a race. So I challenge the beautiful, pretty much naked, man to my left. Jump to me face down on the pavement laughing like a bat shit crazy hobo from Buena Vista Park. Jump to me standing up, not caring about the blood gushing from my hand, but more so for my missing Challis which is shattered to oblivion on Grove Street. Jump to Andrew slapping his back yelling "HOP OoN! HOP OoN!" Like a piggy back ride is going to help me at this point. Jump to Alex pushing Andrew aside and throwing me over his shoulder like a sack of wheat. Jump to me patting his butt the whole way home and leaving bloody hand prints on this nice white shorts.Jump to Liz putting me in the tub and scalding my bloodly hand with hot water. I felt like frickin Ruthie from the Real World, and Liz was my Justin. And finally, jump to me waking up this morning to Emily calling me "Mummy Hand" (because lets face it my hand looked like it had escaped from King Tut's tomb) and bruises the size of Texas.
11) Sorry Mom. Sorry God.
12) Emily showing up late to the party with a plate of Vegitarian Lasagna, and telling me to "fix my shirt".
13) My Quote of the evening (When asked if I would show my boobs): "No one wants to see my boobs. They are uglier than a Harbor Seal."
14) Mother Fuckin Taliban Olympics 2004 BABY!
15) Dancing with "Micheal Jackson" in the middle of Haight Street.
16) Saundra toting around the keyboard playing "Wake me Up" by WHAM! over and over as we parade through Haight street in our "Fashion Don't " attire.
17)Me telling Cat that she is like "WOA" aka a Work Of Art.
18) Writing "'A' GAME!!!" in big blue letters on the Challis.
19) Waking up and looking at my cell phone under "Dialed Calls" most of which lasted a whopping 32 minutes. Sorry Leslie. Sorry Alexei. Sorry Sheyna. Sorry Westin. Sorry Rhoda. Sorry Adrien. Sorry Leslie (again).
20) FYI: My new name is now "Baby Cakes"
21) Yelling through the streets that "Soon my favorite trouble maker will be back in town!!"
22) Taking not only one, but TWO pictues of the same orange cone.
23) Alex suddenly becoming Doogie Howzer M.D.
24) Realizing I am Dorothy in Oz and lovin' every damn minute of it!
So that about covers todays recap of "The Real World:San Fransisco '04" I hope you join me next time in my misadvetures. Until then, keep your pants on but those tacky fisherman hat off. But remember to always bring your 'A' game, and in the words of Elizabeth Devito: "Go big or go home."
P.P.P.S. Sorry Mom. Sorry God. | | |
| ZERO SEVEN/ ZERO FOUR /ZERO FOUR!!!!! WOOOOOOOOO!
"Hey Kevin, you wanna join "the nest"?" ~me
"Oh really?! Can I?" ~kevin
" Yes. But first you must tell me where the mandolin comes from."~me
" Mandola." ~kevin
" Really?! Ok. But I thought it was from SPAINish.."~me
P.S. to all those who were victims of my drunk Fourth of July phone calls, I apolagize for my "boldness". you know who you are... | | |
| just when you think you found true love, you take the early flight home from San Diego and two nude people pop out of your bathroom like a frickin magic show...
...nice doll you got there Frank...yeah shes ok.
SNOOP... SNOOP A LOOOP! | | |
|
